As I get older I find that things really do not bother me as much as they used to. One of the benefits of a greater perspective, I suppose. Anyway, I will take it.
For instance, I am capable of having insomnia. In my 20s and 30s I would watch the clock tick on by and furiously add up the amount of sleep I could get if I fell asleep in 15, 20, or 40 minutes. Result: no sleep and lots of stress. Today, I still have insomnia. Instead of looking at the clock I relax and focus on how nice my 600 thread count sheets feel (another bonus of getting older is the willingness to invest in expensive sheets) and quiet my brain. Result: I am back to sleep before I know it. Still tired in the morning, but not nearly as stressed out.
Or when a friend blows me off. Used to be I was bereft, with several hours of nothingness in front of me. It happened yesterday and I went to a wine tasting with a book. Had a lovely time. Also, my understanding that things come up has increased, so I no longer take the blow-off personally.
One of the things I see happening is that I am projecting less. I am realizing more and more that not only is it not all about me, but it is not even remotely about me. And I am fine with that. Amazing how much room we have for things like books and walks and enjoying life when we don’t make it about us.
There are a lot of things I don’t like about getting older – wrinkles, knee pain, grey hair. But this thing? This thing I like!
Don’t make it about you. Because it’s not. And get yourself some nice sheets. You won’t be sorry!
Tags: insomnia, projecting, self-esteem